Feast of the Holy Family (A)

Sir 3:2-7, 12-14
Ps 128:1-2, 3, 4-5
Col 3:12-21 or Col 3:12-17
Mt 2, 13-15, 19-23

This Sunday we celebrate the Holy Family as well as our own families. All the scriptures at Mass give us instruction on how to be a holy family.

The first reading tells children (young and old) to "honor" and "revere" their parents, to be considerate of them when they get old and feeble and to be kind to them even if they fail to love us well. It does NOT say that children have to obey their parents ALL the time. This scripture never uses the word "obey".

We are to only obey God, and if a parent instructs us to do what God wants us to do (as in the responsorial Psalm), then by obeying Mom or Dad, we're obeying God, but if a parent disobeys God, we are not to follow him or her into sin. We can honor and revere our parents by respecting their personhood even while refusing to cooperate with their sins.

The second reading instructs us to "put on love, the bond of perfection", and to make sure that the peace of Christ controls our hearts. How? Saint Francis de Sales said, "Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset."

Verse 18 is NOT saying that wives should do this by obeying their husbands as if in a child-father relationship. To understand the message here, replace the word "subordinate" or "submit" with "respect". God has put the husband in charge of providing protection for the family (which is why in the Gospel reading it's Joseph, not Mary, who was given the dream) — including spiritual protection (teaching holiness and leading the family to heaven). When a wife respects her husband's personhood (the man God created him to be), she's placing herself (subordinating herself) into his protection, which is also God's protection.

And the husband is commanded to love his wife. Why isn't the wife told to love her husband? Because by nature she's a nurturer and a care-giver. But the man, created to protect, is by nature a warrior. To be holy, the husband must overcome his innate urge to protect himself so that he can make sacrifices for his family, just like Jesus.

Questions for Personal Reflection:

Which family relationships need to become holier? What can you do this week to improve these by (choose the ones that fit your situation) honoring your parents, teaching your children, and showing respect and love for your spouse (or ex-spouse) in imitation of Christ?

Questions for Community Faith Sharing:

Husbands (and ex-husbands and widowers), explain how important it is to feel respected. Wives (and ex-wives and widows), share how respect for husbands is effective in nurturing the marital relationship. How does the husband's protective nature imitate Christ? How does his love also imitate Christ? How is this similarly played out in a priest's relationship with his parish?

Published by Jacob Soo
Credits to Good News Ministries